Smack Talk

now leaving south carolina

Charmed, I’m Sure: A Rebuttal

Steven Cardinal

Jenn C, a northern transplant and marketing enthusiast (I’m really not sure what that is, but anyway) recently got Charlestonians in an uproar with her recent blog post. In it she explains why Charleston isn’t the town for her. Well, she upset quite a few folks and seems to be at a loss for why. Lemme ‘splain. Read more →

madonna erotica

Keyboard shortcuts for erotica authors

Steven Cardinal

Given the increased sales and attention being paid to the erotica industry…

Did you know there’s Sasquatch erotica in addition to dinosaur erotica and tentacle erotica? I’m not making this up!

And given how poorly written the sex scenes were in 50 Shades of Grey, it stands to reason that these works of art(!) become formulaic over time. It takes a lot of sticky pages to satisfy the lust for reading that many frustrated housewives seem to experience. With that in mind, I’d like to offer some keyboard shortcuts to enable in the word processing software of your choosing so that you can jump on the bandwagon and begin selling your tawdry tentacle love triangle quick. Each shortcut will insert a particular type of sex scene. Use with caution. Read more →

angry saruman

West decries Isengard’s human rights violations

Steven Cardinal

angry sarumanMINIS TIRITH – The Kingdom of Gondor’s Security Council took up the issue of Isengard’s orc- and human-rights situation Monday, a move considered by some on the Intra-Middle Earth Gray Council to be dangerously provocative. Isengard, which has long been accused of horrific treatment of both its Uruk Hai and Wildling populations, recently came under fire for their alleged participation in an attack on Rohan. Read more →

satellite fitness parody

Satellite Fitness Parody

Steven Cardinal

satellite fitness parodyNothing says fitness like free junk food and, in this parody commercial, Satellite Fitness provides the best in lunk food. Originally written by Steve for The Cardinal James Show.

christmas sketch comedy with Steve and Charlie

A Cardinal James Xmas

Steven Cardinal

christmas sketch comedyWith the holidays approaching, the Cardinal James Show gang wanted to pay homage, if that’s the right word, to the classic Charlie Brown Christmas. Written by Steve, this Christmas sketch comedy was performed by Steve, Charlie James, Sheila Kern, Jodi Riley, Boyd Stough, and Brad Cooper. It’s sure to become a holiday, family classic. Assuming your family lives in a trailer with a rusty Chevy sitting up on blocks in the front yard next to the collection of empty Budweiser cans and Wild Turkey bottles.

With the passing of Brad in 2014, this show is dedicated to his memory.

Swindler on the Roof

Steven Cardinal

showtunes parody fiddlerCharleston, South Carolina is considered by most to be one of the most beautiful cities in the world and has been voted so my Travel and Leisure Magazine 4 years in a row. But like any city, it has it’s less than beautiful side. Read more →