A Random Numbered List Why Numbered List Articles are So Annoying

“5 Things You Should Do To Be A Great Wife”. “10 things to do to be a great husband”. “7 foods to avoid to lose all the weight you want”. Here’s the one today that I didn’t even read that sent me right to the keyboard “12 things you should drop from your life right […]

angry saruman

West decries Isengard’s human rights violations

angry sarumanMINIS TIRITH – The Kingdom of Gondor’s Security Council took up the issue of Isengard’s orc- and human-rights situation Monday, a move considered by some on the Intra-Middle Earth Gray Council to be dangerously provocative. Isengard, which has long been accused of horrific treatment of both its Uruk Hai and Wildling populations, recently came under fire for their alleged participation in an attack on Rohan. Read more

satellite fitness parody

Satellite Fitness Parody

satellite fitness parodyNothing says fitness like free junk food and, in this parody commercial, Satellite Fitness provides the best in lunk food. Originally written by Steve for The Cardinal James Show.

Karmic Lessons from Yoga Class

Note to self or Karmic lessons for the day: 1. Ordering drinks called “Devils Lips” at the monthly Dirty Old Mens Club Benevolent Association dinner is GOING to bite you in the ass at a 9:30 am yoga class taught by the studio owner (duh). 2. Apparently, the Sacroiliac joint, which I don’t recall ever […]

Ebola update from the Future- November 2017

Panic continues to grip the country as CNN announced this morning the 123rd person died from this raging epidemic. Since it’s been a little over two years since this dreaded disease has swept across the world decimating the world’s population causing 11,142.4 deaths, 24 euthanized dogs, 16 cats, and one beloved hamster, Harry; we should […]

Good vs Evil: First Trips to the Salad Cafe and the Gourmet Grocery Store

Im not on a diet; I don’t believe in them any more. I’m not vegetarian but I do try to subsist on salads anymore. I’m what I call an “Asparagus and Sawdustian”. A good friend, aware of this lifestyle change, suggested I try a new local cafe, called Verde. I made my first visit today. […]

Work Out Clothes

There is no version of this universe and no alternate universe, no matter how much weight I lose, or how “svelte” I get that I’m wearing any version of those clothes to yoga class. Or any other workout class. Or zumba class. Or a gym. I just don’t get workout clothes. I’ve toyed with this […]

Union or Non Union Back(or knees)? How to Tell

My back “went out” again Tuesday night and by “went out” I do not mean on a date for dinner with a hot redhead back. Here I was on Wednesday morning, in pain, and at a complete loss to know whether this was from having slept wrong, or having exercised for 12 out of the […]

Zumba Update, Tourette’s, and Common Core Math

I’ve discovered just this week, much to my joy, that the music in class is actually so loud, I can actually blurt out some of the ridiculous things that come across my brain and nobody can here them. Well, except maybe, once in awhile, the woman standing right next to me. But she pretty much […]

Congratulations, I’m a Second Hand Smoker

Yup. Quit smoking. Last cigarette was 29 days, 21 hours, 33 minutes and 35,36,37,38 seconds ago. I know the preferred term is “non smoker” but that sounds too much like “reformed smoker” to me, and I think reformed smokers are, how can I delicately put this, assholes. Ok, let me try again. I think they’re […]